sob

I fell down our stairs this morning.

I hit practically every step on the way down and it culminated in me lying at the bottom in a crumpled heap bawling my eyes out like a baby. Obviously the shock was part of the reason for the tears but I think I was also sobbing for everything else as well.

It was the second time I've cried this weekend, on Friday evening, I managed to pour a cup of boiling hot milk on my leg when I was at LB's house which prompted another set of tears.

I think both the burning and the fall have released a wave of emotion that I suppose I've been trying to suppress about how sad I am with my current situation. Although it is pure self-pity, I feel disappointed at my lack of achievement to date, especially now I'm in the process of trying to get a new job. Work is grinding me down and I just don't want to be there, but yet the job hunt is frustratingly long. The longer I'm there, the more I lose faith in my abilities.

The NYE post is coming but I don't think I can complete it until I feel a bit more postive.